The next three chapters will help you set up your Wish, your Want, and your Walk. They present specific, guided ways to get ready for a negotiation. The method helps you by providing a format that you can keep for the rest of your life. You can use it as a quick reference for all your negotiations. Use the WishWant-Walk method to be sure that you have covered all the bases before going into any negotiation.
Wish, Want, Walk even goes on vacation with me. I had just finished facilitating a three-day intensive seminar in Singapore and was on a short flight to Sumatra to trek through the rain forests in the far north of that island.
I wanted to see some wild orangutans in their natural habitat. My first negotiation upon arriving at the airport would be simple: arrange for a ride north until there was no more road. Then I would hike for an hour, keeping the river on my left until I reached a small settlement just inside the rain forest.
I used the price suggested in the Lonely Planet guidebook as my Want where I expected the negotiation to end up if the car was in a relatively good condition. I set a Wish slightly cheaper, and I would Walk Away literally if there was more than a 10 percent increase in the price over my Want.
I closed my eyes and enjoyed the rest of the flight as I conjured up images of the trip in my mind. Want: Your Want is where you think the negotiation will end up according to external marketplace forces. It is where the vast majority of deals are closed.
Walk: Your Walk is the point at which you will walk away from a deal because it is simply not worth it. What a great way to start off this adventure! There is no taxi stand with meters at that airport. Instead, I worked through the English-speaking man in the parking lot whom I will call the Fixer.
We started pretty far apart on price, so I switched over to the nonfinancial part of my Wish and settled on the driver congenial, confident and a relatively new SUV the best of the bunch from what I could tell.
We went back to the money part of the deal and landed exactly on my Want. It helped that I kept waving the guidebook and pointing to the price and that I started to Walk Away several times. Well, there was also a roll of toilet paper just in case. I paid the agreed price to the Fixer and climbed up to the passenger seat, ready to be driven three hours to the edge of the rain forest. I had not understood a word of the complicated negotiation that involved dividing up my payment among the Fixer, the Driver, and the Disappointed Ones.
As the driver got in, I noticed a scowl on his face. He responded with a huge frown. He was smiling when you told him where I wanted to go. This time I joined the two men as they haggled.
I told the Fixer to give him more money. I could have cared less if the Fixer was happy. He reluctantly complied. The surprised Driver talked some more to the Fixer. So the Fixer spoke very harshly to the Driver as he shoved more money in his hand. The Driver was so surprised that a big, spontaneous smile flashed across his face. I got in, and off we went.
I shot several rolls of film. It rarely is. This experience from my own life is typical. Know your Wish, Want, Walk ahead of time. Wish, Want, Walk will guide you. But first you must carefully create those three items for your next negotiation. For some people, creating a Wish, Want, Walk comes naturally. They like to spend a lot of time figuring things out before they start.
Expending effort in this way is very comforting to them. Other people, by their very nature, like to jump into a project, letting it take them in whatever direction destiny dictates.
They view preparation as hard work to be avoided at all costs. The majority of people fall somewhere in between. Be sure that you have someone on your team who likes to do the prep work. It is the bedrock of success in any negotiation. Catchy phrases like these are limitless.
Everyone has heard them. We all know they are true. But in our fast-paced world we are constantly cutting corners, and one of the first corners to be cut in negotiating is preparation. We never seem to have enough time to do the job right. Read the next three chapters. Take the time to work out your Wish, your Want, and your Walk before you do anything else. It is time well spent. Your negotiating path is much smoother.
The results are more satisfying. It is the way the world would be if you controlled the world. This is the fun part. The first step in setting your Wish is to take a look into your own perfect future. What is it that you would love to achieve in your life? How are your long-range goals affected by this negotiation? Do not reject anything.
You want to explore every possibility at this stage of the game. Whether you are by yourself on the beach or with a group of suits in the boardroom, be sure that all the ideas are given equal respect. This is where fearless negotiating begins. Put words to your Wishes. Write them down. When this happens, you may feel torn and indecisive. The real problem is not indecision.
The real problem is that you shortchanged yourself on preparing your Wish. Have a freewheeling Wish session with yourself or with your entire team at the outset of the process. Leave no idea off the table in the initial round of brainstorming. You should have fun with this step. Be fearless. Whether you are alone or working with a group, what you will uncover in the process of creating your wish list is the true value of whatever is under negotiation, from your point of view.
You would be asking a very sophisticated question, and the answer to that question is a moving target. Think of anything you like, and I will quickly find ten people who will have ten different notions of its value.
He meant what he said. Richard was in a pickle, and the only way out was a replacement for the horse he had just lost in battle. At that moment, in those circumstances, the true value of a horse to Richard III was huge—it was his entire kingdom. Your true value for a specific item could change according to your perspective. For instance, if you owned an original oil painting by a famous artist and hired a professional appraiser to tell you its value, the first question the appraiser would ask would be the purpose of the appraisal.
If you are selling, you will ask for and receive a somewhat higher appraisal. If you are buying, you will ask for and receive a somewhat lower appraisal. Your position in the world in relation to the item under discussion strongly affects where you set your true value. That is why the person you are negotiating with almost always will place a different value on something than you do.
You are looking at the same thing from different perspectives. If you were trying to insure the painting, you would ask for a high appraisal. If you had that information, you might stay just under that line so that the insurance premium would be lower. In your next negotiation, you are entitled to put any value you want on your product or service.
Figuring out how to justify your Wish comes later. Right now you are making your Wish. You are deciding in your own mind, for your own purposes, exactly what value you are going to put on the goods or services you are buying or selling.
If the item that is the subject of the negotiation is a commodity you are selling, you would typically compete primarily on price.
In that case, you will have to look to reliability or delivery systems to create your value. True value starts in your mind. No one is going to value you and your services higher than you do. Your idea of the true value of what you are negotiating is the key factor in setting your Wish. As a seller, you would never place your Wish below your notion of the true value of what it is you are offering.
It is legitimate to hope to sell something for more than you think it is worth. Never open a negotiation to sell something by asking less than the true value you put on the item.
Culling the many wishes down to the final, more manageable number of goals is so important that I created a system to help you do that. In fact, I use the word system as an acronym specific, you-centered, stretch, time-sensitive, everybody, manageable to guide you to your final Wish list.
First, get rid of the general ideas, the things that are not specific. That is the Wish. To be part of the planning for a specific negotiation, your Wish must be specific.
Never lose sight of the main player in this and every negotiation you will ever have: you. You, of course, rarely means you alone as an individual with no need to answer to anybody. Even for the most personal purchase, you usually will include your spouse or partner. In a business environment, you may be part of a small company with perhaps only one or two other people who need to be included or may be part of a large company with a wide variety of people who need to be brought into the process.
Whether the group is large or small, your Wish has to be centered on you, meaning the core group. You or your group are the only one who matters in this process of setting goals. There are always folks out there who will discourage you and tell you that such and such is not possible. You and your inner circle just need to draw on your own experiences and values as you determine what you Wish to achieve.
Next, take anything off the list that is not a stretch for you. If you already have something in hand, it is not part of your Wish in the negotiation. It is part of your Want: what you expect out of the negotiation, where you think the marketplace will drive the negotiation. Everything on your Wish list should require you to stretch a bit. Your Wish has to be time-sensitive. Some of your Wishes may be appropriate for a negotiation coming up on Monday.
Others are Wishes that you have for the next few years, and so they need to be timed for the future. The less immediate Wishes may be mentioned in your initial presentation as things you want to accomplish in the future, not in the immediate negotiation. You let the other party know where you want to take the relationship. Of course, this does not apply to a one-time, price-only negotiation such as you might have on a used car lot or in a curio shop while on vacation.
These are not the situations in which you discuss your long-range goals and aspirations unless they are part of your pitch for a better price.
I am reminded of the young waiters who let you know they are saving for college. They have time-coded their Wishes and used the long-range Wish to increase the chances that you will help them with the shortrange Wish. Be sure that everybody who needs to approve of your Wish list is brought into the process as soon as possible. Frequently, your organization will have a whole team of people who need to buy into the goals of the negotiation, that is, the Wishes that are being set.
Bring them aboard, perhaps in a less formal manner, but bring them aboard anyway. It will be worth your time in the long run to include everybody affected by the negotiation. Finally, make sure that your Wishes are manageable in number. Landing a man on the moon seemed impossible to a lot of Americans when the Wish initially was set. But those advising the president at that time were sure that it could be done given enough lead time, enough money, and a national commitment to do it.
Sure enough, Neil Armstrong made the first footprint on the moon within the time set and only slightly over budget. Focusing on a single Wish turned out to be manageable. Make sure your Wishes make you stretch at least a little. T Time-sensitive: There is a tide and time to everything, even your dreams. Peg a time to each item on your Wish list. That will help you know how to present your Wish when you make the opening offer. E Everybody: Be sure you have buy-in from the entire team and even from the people who will bug you about it later.
The more focused you are, the more likely you are to achieve your dreams. The student said that what he really wanted was to have the professor publicly slapped. A public slapping was not on the final list of Wishes. Its presence on the flipchart, however, shaped the entire conversation because it underscored the emotional intensity that a few members of the group felt toward the subject of the negotiation.
How did it turn out? The professor apologized to the student. A memorandum about his behavior was put in his personnel file, and he was counseled. Joyfully, these three results were three of the items placed on the Wish list that the students put together as a homework assignment.
The three Wishes were a bit of a stretch and were very time-sensitive since graduation was just weeks away. Everybody agreed to those Wishes, and they were manageable in number. Everybody was happy with the result, especially the student who initially felt wronged by the incident. He was less frustrated because he got to verbalize his Wish and it was treated with respect.
He felt heard for the first time in the process. Ultimately, the complaining student was the one who eliminated the outlandish Wishes. Learn More about Yourself As you think about your Wish, you realize how intensely personal it is. Learn all you can about yourself. Learn about your personality type, set out your vision of your future, and understand realistically where you fit into your organization.
Sometimes I speak and teach about the benefits of a three-year plan for everybody. In your business you should also have a written three-year plan so that everybody who works with you will know where the business is going.
Everyone in the office should be familiar with the plan. In fact, you should know as much as you can about the entire team. Ask that person what his or her three-year plan is. What picture does that person have in his or her head of life in three years? How does that person see his or her life in three years? In your personal life, you also need a three-year plan. Whether it is written or not, you should have a vision—a picture in your head—of what life will be like in three years.
That way, your negotiations can feed your vision. The actions you take, the places you invest your time, the books you read—everything you do—moves you either toward your vision or away from your vision. Create your vision right now. When you know all that, you will be on your way to becoming a world-class negotiator. I want them to know how it feels. If they were yelled at, they want to learn to yell back. If they were outtalked by a loquacious charmer, they want to learn to tell stories that are even better.
World-class negotiators come in all sizes, shapes, colors, and personality types. There is no single style that must be used if you are to get what you want in life. Successful negotiators, like successful people in general, are individuals who let their light shine forth, no matter what it is. Brooke Astor, the New York socialite, was caught up in one of the toughest negotiations of all. When she was in her nineties, a mugger approached her on the streets of New York, demanding that she turn over her purse and jewels.
I am Mrs. Brooke Astor. The mugger ran off. Trust your own style. It is where you are most comfortable, and most likely to find success in a negotiation. Sticking with your own style increases the odds of success in a negotiation enormously because you will appear more genuine and therefore more trustworthy. You are not trying to be someone you are not. As a young lawyer, I was dazzled maybe slightly jealous and in awe of my kid sister, Sally, who was rising rapidly in the financial world.
When she was vice president at Oppenheimer, she had twenty-one MBAs reporting to her. She would call me about once a week. This was in the old days before the electronic answering systems that are omnipresent today. That was it. For several years, my relationship with my sister centered on those wonderful phone calls. I learned them. I rehearsed them. I told them in meetings. I am not a joke teller. The jokes bombed. It was not pretty. I learned that what worked for Sally would not work for me.
It took me many more years to learn that the best style was my own style. If I wanted to be a world-class negotiator, I had to believe in myself. I had to use the unique person who was me. If I tried to be anybody else, it would not work. One of the most important things you have to decide about yourself is what kind of business you want and what kind of customers you want to serve.
Once you have thought about that, you can decide which customers are apples—to be polished regularly—and which are onions—to be discarded before they make you cry. You will increase your job satisfaction substantially by thinking about the sorts of persons you will allow into your business family as clients, customers, and vendors.
Unfortunately, sometimes you will have to learn the hard way what types fit into your business life. We all accept clients and customers we wish we had not accepted. I have even constructed a matrix so that you will have a graphic to help you think about how to use this metaphor. Figure shows an apple in the upper right-hand box to represent the folks you want to seek out and welcome into your business life.
Those people have a lot of the qualities you like to work with. These boxes are there for you to write down the qualities that make a person an onion for you and the qualities that make a person an apple for you Figure Fill in the two boxes under the apple.
Each box is a quality you like to see in your customers. Think about the best client or customer you ever had. Write one word in each of the boxes. Now fill in the two boxes under the onion.
Think about the worst pain-in-the-neck customer you ever had. If they do not, the work still gets done, but the psychic payoff is missing. Like most people, I feel that job satisfaction is important. Appreciation manifests itself in being responsive when we need some information and paying bills on time. Sometimes they are short with my team members who are trying to help them. This usually manifests itself in a failure to be responsive when we need something from them and a failure to stay current in their payments.
For me, the apples are the clients with a high return to my psyche and my pocketbook understanding and appreciative and the onions are clients with a low return to my psyche and my pocketbook worrisome and unappreciative. You must know what sorts of people you want to serve. You will never turn an onion into an apple.
It is not possible. For me, it is often simply a matter of charging more. At least those people will become highly profitable onions. The better choice is to work only for apples you know while you try to add others. In a world of abundance, you fire your onions, make room, and add apples. Sometimes if my contact person within a company is an onion, I try to change my contact person. This is a delicate political dance, but I have pulled it off more than once.
If it works, I have an apple to deal with without losing the business. One of two things happens: This conversation amounts to a wake-up call and I receive the desired behavior change or the client leaves, which is fine. One of the most important steps is to stay away from the onions.
You can spot them. Tag them and turn them down. Smile all the way home. When you turn down an onion, you win twice: 1. One of your competitors does. When you have a client or customer who is an onion, figure out what changes can make the relationship less painful. I have mentioned the two techniques I use most often. Think about how you can move your onions into one of the empty squares in the illustration. Many people working for large corporations are reluctant to get rid of onions because most of the pain will fall on other employees and the presence of the income the onions bring to the balance sheet may help them in some way.
In small businesses, there is often a fear of dumping the onions because of lessened cash flow. The opposite is true. Your income will go up when you are working only for apples. You will enjoy your work more and be more productive. Apples by definition appreciate your efforts and reward you appropriately. Your Want is the place where you think the negotiation is most likely to end up on the basis of all the facts and circumstances in the situation.
No matter who is negotiating the deal, no matter how blustery someone becomes, no matter how much rehearsal goes on, the market is king. The market rules. The marketplace your Want is the single most stabilizing factor in a negotiation.
Because Want is really a marketplace projection, it is more akin to a target than to a specific number, although I like the discipline of using a single number when I set up Wish, Want, Walk for any negotiation. Anybody who knows the market well knows the approximate amount that something will sell for or something can be purchased for. Price is often the easiest part of the negotiation. It is all the other things you and your customer want that make the negotiation interesting. It is all the other things that will push the price up or down—things such as delivery, quality, scope of work, other services, exclusivity, experience, and customer service.
Each one of those things should have its own Wish, Want, Walk. The best source of information about the marketplace is your own experience, but there are lots of other sources. As seminars turn to this subject, I always ask where the participants go for their information about market conditions.
Cost, Price, and Value To understand Want, you must understand the differences among cost, price, and value. When you understand these three distinct concepts, you will gain powerful insight into the role of the marketplace in establishing your Want.
Someone else probably will place a different value on the same item. Never does one figure represent the value of an item at all times, in all places, and to all people. We talked a lot about true value in Chapter 2.
Even gold fluctuates in its price, so we say the value of gold fluctuates. The dollar fluctuates in the price that citizens of other countries pay for it, so we say the value of the dollar is rising or falling. Retail goods lose value over time; that is why there are sales. The price of something is what people end up paying in the marketplace.
It is the number written on the price tag. When you think you got a real bargain, you are saying that you put a value on something that was higher than the price you paid for that item.
The price of similar items sold at the same time in the same general area tends to be about the same no matter who you buy them from. You can bargain the price down a bit, but the price tends to stay within a range set by the marketplace. Projecting the price you are most likely to pay for something is what this chapter is all about.
The cost is what is spent getting a product to market: raw materials, manufacturing, packaging, and shipping plus some overhead and some profit. In fact, value, price, and cost are another way of defining the Wish your idea of the true value of an item , the Want the marketplace price of an item , and the Walk the cost to create the item, including some profit. It rarely matches the price perfectly even when you set the asking price! Value is what you imagine it to be. It is intensely personal.
Your Wish is your idea of true value. It fluctuates over time and varies in different locales. It is your Want. Cost plus some overhead and some profit usually defines the Walk Away for the seller. There are three aspects that make up the price of every product and service. The ideal customer understands that if the price is to be reasonable, the other two elements have to be reasonable see Figure Either the price will have to go up or the quality is going to suffer.
That rule of commerce is as predictable and reliable as any rule of physics. It is a rule of life. Throw the balance off in any one direction and adjustments will occur in one or both of the other directions.
If a customer wants higher quality, the price will rise and it probably will take a little longer. Plan ahead for requests that make the price go up. That way, when the customer asks for faster delivery or better quality, you can answer by describing the effect that request has on the price. When customers ask for a lower price, you can let them know the impact on quality or delivery time.
In our office, quality will not be forsaken, so any rush increases the price. Any price reduction will increase the time to deliver. Price and Time The way time pushes and pulls on price merits some special discussion. Goods delivered quickly almost always cost more, especially if the goods are specially built items that must be assembled and delivered quickly. Whether you are building a house, putting together a computer, or rushing out a print job, there is an added charge for meeting a deadline that is shorter than the norm.
Your early conversations and first efforts on behalf of a client are often the most valuable. The more intangibles that are involved, the truer the statement is, but it is true even if you are selling widgets to a supplier who bases his or her decisions almost entirely on price.
Ironically, it can be difficult to charge adequately for such initial advice and planning. Value to the customer Planning and needs analysis Executing the plan Product delivery Time in the relationship Figure The final delivery of a tangible product is the point in the relationship where there is the least value and the greatest chance for complaints.
The early work of assessing needs is the most valuable and the most insulated from criticism. After all, everybody has a right to his or her opinion. Most often, it is at the initial stage where the highest value to the client or customer lies.
You need to figure out how to charge for it. As a young lawyer trying to build a practice, I had a policy of providing an initial one-hour free consultation to independent filmmakers. I viewed it as a way to help the embryonic independent filmmaking community of which I wanted to be a part. I found it difficult to cut that off, at least before the contracts had to be drawn, but there was always somebody else who could produce the contracts less expensively.
Once I had developed a strategy and laid out a plan of work in the initial meeting, the potential client usually could find another lawyer to execute the plan more cheaply than I would. Now I charge a consultation fee. Not only does it represent a nice bit of income, it weeds out nonserious filmmakers. It eliminates the nonpayers and strongly inhibits the time-consuming follow-up questions that seem to know no boundaries. My practice has flourished since I began to charge for the initial planning and strategy work I do for new clients.
The big picture is usually my most valuable contribution to the client. Scouting the Opposition In addition to researching generalized information about the price the marketplace puts on the thing you are selling or buying, you want to determine the value of the thing you are negotiating to the individual on the opposite side of the table. For instance, after you have established a fair market value for something you are selling, say, your business, you want to adjust your Want up or down depending on the buyer.
If the buyer is a competitor who needs some patents you hold or needs customers you have or needs a sales team you have built, the value will be higher to that person, so the price will go up. A critical driver to the place where the negotiation is going to end up is the party on the other side of the table.
That seems obvious, yet the biggest single mistake people make when they negotiate is not to learn all they can about the person with whom they are negotiating.
John Friess, the vice president of wired. MD, Inc. His company creates high-quality educational videos for healthcare providers to show their patients to reinforce what they tell a patient in the hospital or clinic. The product reduces the misunderstandings that often trigger errors in the follow-up that needs to happen after the doctor visit.
Another company that sells similar products to public libraries offered to license copies of 70 of the videos wired. MD had created. It would place the videos of wired. MD with over new customers. Return to Book Page. Preview — Fearless Negotiating by Michael C. Donaldson Goodreads Author. Never fear another negotiation! Powerhouse entertainment lawyer and negotiating guru Michael Donaldson has distilled a lifetime of negotiating success into a simple, straightforward plan to get you what you want, when you want it-without the angst.
If you've ever been uncertain before a negotiation, felt beaten up after, or thought you could have and should have negotiated b Never fear another negotiation! If you've ever been uncertain before a negotiation, felt beaten up after, or thought you could have and should have negotiated better, "Fearless Negotiating" shows you, step by step, how to erase your fears and preconceptions and tap into the master negotiator that lives within you.
This short and compelling guide is an essential companion to achieving more rewarding, meaningful, and mutually satisfying business and personal relationships and outcomes. Donaldson introduces his remarkably effective Wish-Want-Walk Method, which has been successfully presented in seminars around the world: WISH-set a goal for the negotiation WANT-know where the market is most likely to push the results WALK-draw the line that you will not cross "Wish, Want, Walk" will be your guide, telling you when to start the bidding, when to quit while you're ahead, and when to cut your losses.
Establishing these three points beforehand will make you more comfortable at the negotiating table, reduce your stress, and even help you predict the likely outcome. Donaldson also shows you how to make the most of your time between creating your Wish-Want-Walk plan and when you go into the negotiating session.
He helps you get in touch with your inner, natural-born negotiator, making it easier to make opening offers, bargain with confidence, and seal the deal you want. Get A Copy. Hardcover , pages. More Details Original Title. Other Editions 5.
Friend Reviews. To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up. To ask other readers questions about Fearless Negotiating , please sign up. Lists with This Book. This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list ». Community Reviews. Showing Average rating 3.
Rating details. More filters. Sort order. Jan 12, Brian Stevenson rated it it was ok. The method is good but should be able to get the point across in much less time rather than drawing it out page after page. View 1 comment. Oct 21, E. Nicholas Mariani rated it liked it. A very useful primer on the art of negotiation. Much of Donaldson's thesis mainly, that before going into any negotiation, you should establish your "wish," "want," and "walk away" points will seem obvious and like basic common sense, especially for anyone who finds themselves in negotiations on a semi-regular basis.
Still, there's much wisdom here and anyone who's heading into a negotiation would be well served in being up to speed on the "Wish, Want, Walk" method.
I know it's helped me numerous times through the years. Jan 09, Fernando rated it it was amazing Shelves: business. I have always thought that negotiating is one of the most dreadful and challenging things in business.
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